


5 Times Peter Had A Panic Attack

by doctornineandthreequarters



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Anxiety, Hurt Peter Parker, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Precious Peter Parker, Sam Wilson Is a Good Bro, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-19
Updated: 2019-02-24
Packaged: 2019-10-31 15:26:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17852186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doctornineandthreequarters/pseuds/doctornineandthreequarters
Summary: And the one time he didn't.





	1. Loud Noises

**Author's Note:**

> I know the 5+1 Things trope is done to death, but I love it and it fit really well with this idea. Enjoy!

**1.**

Peter was sitting in the lab working on his suit. He came by the Tower every Wednesday to work with Tony. It was his favorite thing to do, if he was being honest, and he was sure Tony knew (you know, because he talked a lot?). May was fine with it too, although she worried about Peter much more now that she knew he was Queens’ crime-fighting vigilante. 

Tony was supposed to be working on the suit with him, but Rhodey had shown up and they were talking. Peter was trying not to eavesdrop, but he had super hearing and it wasn’t like they were whispering. Besides, it wasn’t anything top-secret. Mostly, Rhodey wanted to know about a few adjustments with his braces, in case he needed to suit up. Peter just minded his own business and kept tinkering with his suit.

Until a loud bang sounded through the lab.

Rhodey had been holding something and it clanged against a metal table. It was innocent enough, but it startled Peter. He dropped the instrument he was holding out, it clanging as well. Peter squeezed his eyes shut, willing the memories to go away.

It sounded like a gunshot.

His mind dragged him back to that night. The one he tried to not remember. The one where he lost his Uncle Ben. 

He should’ve been able to stop the robber. But he had a very minimal understanding of what he could and couldn’t do. And the robber had a gun and he was sure he wasn’t bullet proof. But the robber didn’t care about the masked vigilante, didn’t even try to shoot him. He shot around him, not caring who he hit. Uncle Ben had just been an innocent victim. But Peter should’ve been able to save him. Should’ve been able to stop it from happening. But he didn’t. Ben was dead because of him.

He remembered May’s sobs. Her screaming out Ben’s name, willing him not to be gone. He remembered the pain in her eyes as they buried him next to his parents. As she stood next to the person who could’ve prevented that loss. He couldn’t do much to comfort her, just sat there numbly as she cried, guilt filling every fiber of his being.

He tried to block the memories away, those awful feelings filling him back up. He couldn’t live through all that again. He just couldn’t. He could hear sounds around him, but everything was all too much. 

“Kid,” Tony’s voice came through the noise. “Kid listen to me.” Peter’s eyes flew open in a panic. Tony was standing in front of him, his eyes wide with worry. Peter realized he was barely breathing, puffing out pathetic attempts to suck in air.

“Can’t,” Peter started, his arms clawing at his sweater. “Can’t breathe.” Tony grabbed Peter’s arms, trying to balance the teen.

“Pete just listen to me okay,” Tony said, trying to remain calm but his voice filled with urgency. “Just breathe okay.” Peter shook his head, unable to quell the pain rising in his chest. Tony took Peter’s hand and put it against his chest. “Just try to match my breathing okay.” Tony took a deep breath and Peter tried to copy it, struggling at first. Tony repeated, nodding for Peter to do the same. The two stayed like that for a few minutes, Tony trying to get Peter to follow him. Peter finally stepped breath, feeling the pain dissipate. Tony let out a breath of relief.

“S-sorry,” Peter said. He only realized then that he was crying. He glanced over at Rhodey who offered him an encouraging smile.

“Kid you have nothing to be sorry for,” Tony said. “I know all about panic attacks.” Peter wiped his eyes on his sleeves, not really believing Tony. This was Tony Stark after all, the guy oozed confidence.

“He’s telling the truth,” Rhodey said, stepping towards them. “Tony’s an anxious wreck. Used to just take off if he was having a panic attack. I bought him like three books on it, because it wasn’t a healthy coping mechanism.” Tony rolled his eyes, but looked over at Peter.

“R-really?” Peter asked and Tony nodded.

“Sit,” He said, pointing to the stool. Peter obliged, still embarrassed by what happened. “Do you want to talk about it?” Peter pulled the sleeves of his sweater over his hands, balling them up in the process.

“The sound,” Peter said quietly. “It sounded like a gunshot.” Tony nodded. He was a little surprised. The kid went out every night and fought bad guys. Why would that sound startle him? “I know it sounds stupid, I just didn’t expect it and it reminded me of…” His voice trailed off and he covered his eyes, trying to hide the fact that he was crying again. Tony put his hand on Peter’s shoulder and let the kid have a minute.

“Of what,” Tony asked gently.

“The night my uncle died,” Peter said, wiping his eyes. “And how I could’ve stopped it.” Tony looked down at the teen sadly. He knew May’s husband had been killed in a robbery gone wrong, he just didn’t know that Peter was there.

“Oh Pete,” Tony said quietly. He knew that pain, the pain of watching someone you love die. He had dealt with it far too many times.

“It’s stupid I know,” Peter said miserably, looking down at his shoes. Tony looked at Rhodey who moved his hands, encouraging Tony to speak.

“No Pete it’s not,” Tony said. “But it’s not your fault that your uncle is gone. It’s the sicko with the gun who’s at fault.” Peter sniffled but didn’t look up, tears falling freely down his face. “Kid, you stop bad guys all the time and Queens is better for having their friendly neighborhood Spider-Man. And I bet your uncle would be proud of who you are today.” Peter looked up at him, his eyes red with tears. It made Tony’s heart hurt to see the kid so upset.

“You really think so?” Peter asked and without hesitation Tony nodded. He was proud of the kid and he was damn sure his uncle would be too. “Thanks Mr. Stark.”

“Anytime kid,” Tony said. “Go get yourself a glass of water. And a tissue. Sweaters are for wearing.” Peter cracked a small smile and headed out of the lab. Tony sighed and looked at Rhodey.

“Nice work Tones,” Rhodey said. “You’re good with him.” Tony nodded, a small smile on his face. “Now back to me?”

“What a heart you’ve got Rhodey,” Tony said, clapping his best friend on the shoulder. He glanced back at the lab door. As Rhodey talked, Tony simply watched to door. When Peter finally, came back into the lab, Tony nodded to him before turning his attention back to Rhodey.

Peter sat back at the table, feeling a little more relaxed. He was glad he had someone to talk it out with and was glad that Tony had been there for him. He glanced at his mentor and smiled a little before getting back to work.


	2. Claustrophobia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “There appears to be a malfunction with the elevator,” FRIDAY intoned. “While it reboots, I have alerted boss of the situation.” Peter nodded, feeling his heart rate pick up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! Please enjoy.

**2.**

Peter jogged towards the tower, bopping to the music playing through his headphones. It was Wednesday, so that mean he could work with Tony in the lab. Tony tried to convince him to let Happy pick him up, but Peter refused. He preferred to take the subway and it wasn’t like he was in a rush. He finally reached the Tower and headed inside. He waved towards the main desk. They all knew about the teen and how he had an internship there. They were all pretty impressed that Tony Stark would select a teen for an internship, but word was Peter was extraordinarily smart. Not to mention, most people who had met him liked him. He was charming, in a sweet way. 

Peter got on the elevator, mouthing along to the words. He took one ear bud out.

“Mr. Stark’s lab FRI,” Peter said.

“Boss told me to bring you to the kitchen first,” FRIDAY intoned and Peter rolled his eyes. “He wants to make sure you eat something first.” Peter sighed, a small smirk on his lips. Leave it to Mr. Stark to force him to have a snack after school. He put the ear bud back in and bounced his head around to the music. He felt the elevator stop. He looked at the number. It was floor 83, where the training rooms were. The door opened and Wanda stepped into the elevator. Peter took his headphones out.

“Oh hi Peter,” Wanda said with a smile. She was wearing athletic wear and had a towel in her hand. Peter took the headphones out of his phone and put them in his pocket. 

“Hi Wanda,” Peter said, smiling back at her. He liked having Wanda around. Wanda was the closest in age to him. She also didn’t treat him like a little kid. Sure, she treated him like a little brother, but that was more bearable than Captain America lecturing him on a good’s night rest. He already had Tony demanding he eat the minute he arrived, he didn’t need the rest of the Avengers trying to tell him how to take care of himself.

Wanda didn’t do that. She asked him about what he was learning in school, not that she could keep up, but she would listen which he appreciated. She would always fix his hair and tease him for how easily embarrassed he got. Peter imagined that if he had grown up with a sister, it would’ve felt like that.

“Where are you headed?” Wanda asked, wiping some sweat off her forehead. Peter wondered what she had been working on in the training room. He made a mental note to ask her later.

“I was supposed to meet Mr. Stark in the lab,” Peter said. “But I’m being forced to go to the kitchen to get food first.” Wanda laughed a little and Peter felt his ears turn to red. 

“Well good thing I’m headed there too,” Wanda said, reaching over to fix a stray hair on Peter’s head. Peter smiled and gently nudged her hand anyway, even though he didn’t mind it. “I need something to eat after training with Nat. She does not pull her punches.” Peter chuckled.

“No she does not,” They both laughed but stopped when they felt the elevator stop suddenly. Peter and Wanda both wobbled for stability, before grounding themselves.

“FRIDAY?” Peter called, wondering why they were stopped.

“There appears to be a malfunction with the elevator,” FRIDAY intoned. “While it reboots, I have alerted boss of the situation.” Peter nodded, feeling his heart rate pick up.

“How long?” He asked.

“Rebooting the elevator’s system could take anywhere from 10 to 20 minutes,” FRIDAY said. Peter felt his heart start to beat faster and his breath grow labored. So they were trapped, in the elevator. He leaned his hand against the railing to stabilize himself and tried not to focus on the fact that they were in the elevator, trapped.

“Peter?” Wanda asked, looking at the younger boy. He just shook his head, his breath becoming more and more labored. It wasn’t the elevator that was freaking him out, it was the idea of being trapped in a small, enclosed space. It reminded him of….

He gasped for air, memories of being trapped under that warehouse flooding back to him. His knees gave way and he sunk down to the floor. Wanda was in front of him immediately, but he couldn’t hear what she was saying. He gasped for air, feeling like he was being crushed under thousands of pounds of concrete. Wanda was blurry in front of him, his vision spotty, but she seemed to be speaking to him and the ceiling. He chest filled with pain and his head was pounding. He wanted to scream from the pain but he couldn’t breathe. 

“Peter!” Suddenly he could hear Tony’s voice. He wasn’t there, so he must’ve been transmitting through FRIDAY’s programming. “Kid, you gotta breathe.” Peter shook his head.

“How long for the elevator?” Wanda asked, staring fearfully at Peter. She was scared for him. She felt helpless.

“5 more minutes,” Tony said. “I’m working as fast as I can. Wanda, you have to calm him down.” 

“How?” She asked desperately. Peter was like her little brother. Watching him be in pain hurt her. 

“He’s having a panic attack,” Tony’s voice came through clearly. “You have to get him to breathe.” Wanda nodded, not even sure if Tony could see her. She sat down in front of Peter and took his hand. 

“Just breathe with me,” She said, trying to be calm. She took a breath and Peter gasped for air. “Please, breathe with me.” Peter’s eyes were filling up with tears and he seemed to be clawing for air. Wanda pulled him into a hug, hoping he could feel her breathing. Peter buried his head in her shoulder, feeling every inhale and exhale from Wanda. He wasn’t in the warehouse anymore. He wasn’t trapped under concrete. He was in the elevator with Wanda again. Slowly but surely, his breath became less labored. Wanda hugged him tightly, feeling a few tears from her eyes drop. They sat there for what felt like an eternity.

Finally, the elevator began to move. It reached the 93rd floor in record time. The door opened with a ding and suddenly Tony was inside the elevator. 

“Pete, are you okay?” His expression softened when he saw the two of them. Wanda let go of Peter and stood up, helping him up as well. Peter looked at Tony, his eyes red, and nodded.

“S-sorry,” Peter said and Tony shook his head.

“It’s fine,” Tony said. “I’m just glad you’re okay.” Peter stepped towards him and Tony instinctively pulled Peter into a hug. Peter was still feeling a little shaky, but hugged him back, feeling safer that way. Tony pulled away and ruffled his hair, a small smile on his face. “Go get something to eat alright.” Peter nodded and headed towards the kitchen. Wanda and Tony stepped out of the elevator and watched Peter.

“Thanks,” Tony said. It wasn’t easy talking to Wanda. He held a lot of guilt for what she had been through and she certainly didn’t feel any need to alleviate that guilt. But he knew she adored Peter and that was enough for Tony. Wanda nodded.

“I saw why he was so scared,” Wanda said quietly, looking at her hands. “He’s been through so much.” Tony nodded sadly, watching as Peter sat at the counter, slowly picking apart a pop tart. 

“Good thing he’s got people looking out for him,” Tony said, before walking over to Peter. He didn’t want to startle the kid anymore, so he just stood by him. “You doing better, kid?” Peter nodded a little. “And I’ll get the elevator fixed up.”

“Just don’t lose any sleep over it,” Peter said. “I heard Ms. Potts telling you, you need to sleep more.” Tony rolled his eyes but ruffled Peter’s hair.

“I think she’ll forgive me for this one,” Tony said. Peter couldn’t help but smile. He looked over at Wanda who smiled at him before disappearing down one of the hallways. He looked down at his food, finally feeling settled, and began to eat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scream with me on my Tumblr: http://doctornineandthreequarters.tumblr.com/


	3. Being Grabbed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suddenly, someone grabbed him. Peter let out a strangled shout. His heart rate picked up and his breath quickened. The arm that grabbed him was wrapped around his neck, holding him in a choke hold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh this chapter hurt me to write but it had to be done.

**3.**

Peter sat in his room at the Compound. His aunt was away for the weekend, so Peter was staying at the Compound. He was there once a month, either because May was away or because Tony wanted him to train with Nat or someone else. Peter loved it. Being around the Avengers, even if he wasn’t an official member, was still exciting. They made him feel like he was a part of the team. Sure, sometimes they all felt parental, but he was sure it was all harmless.

It was late, close to 2 AM. Peter was working on a homework assignment, mostly because he didn’t want to have to worry about it for the rest of the weekend. He yawned and stretched. He was so close to being done, but he was tired. He sighed and stood up. Maybe a snack would help him. He exited his room and headed towards the kitchen. 

Now that everything related to the issues in Germany and the Accords had been settled (not as all sides wanted it, but compromises had to be made), most of the Avengers were back at the compound. Nat, Rhodey, Vision, and Wanda lived there permanently, though they would also go to Tower, especially now that they had met Peter and realized he spent more time there than at the compound (okay so that was only true for Wanda and Nat, but Vision went wherever Wanda went and Rhodey seemed to pop in and out of the Tower whenever he wanted anyways). Clint was there occasionally, but he had a family, so he spent more time at home. Peter had yet to meet Ant-Man, but had heard a lot about the insect themed hero. 

Sam was there occasionally, but only was really there if Steve was around. And Steve, for reasons that were not explained to Peter, didn’t live at the Compound full-time. Based on a conversation, that Peter totally wasn’t eavesdropping on, it had something to do with Steve’s guilt over something that had happened in Siberia. All Peter knew was that he didn’t hear from or see Tony for a while after this incident and that he probably wouldn’t have heard from his mentor if it hadn’t been for Toomes’ operation in Queens.

As he reached the kitchen, he heard a noise. The hairs on his arm stood up and he looked around, trying to find the source of it. He did a slow circle around the dark kitchen, to see if he could see anyone or anything.

Suddenly, someone grabbed him. Peter let out a strangled shout. His heart rate picked up and his breath quickened. The arm that grabbed him was wrapped around his neck, holding him in a choke hold. He looked down and saw a glint of metal. He recognized it immediately; he had blocked a punch from that same arm in Germany.

He had heard rumors that Bucky Barnes, the former Winter Soldier, was coming to the Compound. He had been in Wakanda, but it seemed like it was safe for him to leave. Even so, there was still a lot of heat on him, so the Compound was the only safe place for Bucky. He had never heard if Tony had agreed to it, but clearly he had, as Bucky was here. And currently treating him like a hostile.

“Stop, please,” Peter said, trying to get Bucky’s metal arm off him. His breath started to pick up, his chest constricting. He let out another strangled cry. Suddenly, Bucky released him, realizing the other person was a lot younger than he had expected. He flipped the light on and stared in shock at the started teenager in front of him.

Peter, now experienced in these feelings, knew he was in the middle of a panic attack. His breathing was barely there, just pathetic gasps for air. The lack of oxygen made his vision swirl, only added to the fact that Bucky had been constricting his air flow. He grabbed the counter for support, feeling his legs grow weak. 

“Shit,” Bucky muttered, his entire being filling with dread. There were footsteps and suddenly Tony and Pepper were in the kitchen.

“Peter,” Pepper said, alarm in her voice. She quickly crossed to the distressed teen. She pulled a stool up and gently pushed him on to it.

 “The hell did you do Barnes?” Tony asked, anger filling his whole being. He already wasn’t too thrilled to have Bucky there. Now he was scaring the kid? Tony took a threatening step towards Bucky, but stopped when he saw Steve and Sam appear behind Bucky.

“Buck what’s going on?” Steve asked, alert even though he had just been asleep.

 “I heard a noise and thought it was an intruder,” Bucky said weakly. “I didn’t know there was a kid here.” He looked over and Peter who was still struggling to breath.

“A kid who has panic attacks,” Pepper said, gently brushing Peter’s hair, trying to stop the boy from shaking. Tony had told her about Peter’s panic attacks, but she didn’t realize how severe they could be. Then again, it was oddly fitting that Tony, who suffered from panic attacks, managed to find a protégé who struggled with a similar issue. Tony glared at Bucky before walking over to Peter.

“I didn’t mean to scare the kid,” Bucky said. “I swear Steve.” Steve nodded. He should’ve told Bucky about Peter. But Tony had made it clear that he didn’t want Bucky around the kid. It was clear that Tony didn’t trust Bucky and if Steve trusted Bucky, then he didn’t trust Steve either. Sam stepped around them and gently moved towards Peter. Tony fixed a glare on Sam.

“Listen I work with vets with PTSD,” Sam said, holding his hands up. “Mind if I try something?” Tony still glared at Sam, but Pepper nodded. Sam turned to Peter. “Peter, I want you to tell me about the stool you’re sitting on.”

“W-what?” Peter choked out. Tony gave Sam a look, not sure what he was doing.

“Just tell me about it,” Sam said. “What’s it made of?” 

“M-metal,” Peter said, sucking in some air. “P-probably a titanium alloy.”

“I don’t know what that means kid,” Sam said. “I’m not a genius.”

“It means its durable,” Tony said, rolling his eyes. He could see Peter wasn’t shaking as much anymore.

“How does the chair feel?” Sam asked.

“C-cold,” Peter said. “And uncomfortable. I-it-t should have a p-pillow on it.” Peter said. Tony mouthed ‘duly noted’ and nodded to Sam. Clearly whatever he was doing was working.

“How do you feel?” Sam asked. “Can you take a deep breath?” Sam exemplified this for him. Peter inhaled deeply and then let the air out. “Better?” Peter nodded.

“Thanks Mr. Wilson,” Peter said.

“Anytime kid,” Sam said. “Sometimes, focusing on an object pulls you out of the moment and helps you calm down. I know some other tricks if you ever want some help.” Peter nodded and attempted a smile. “We’ll talk tomorrow, I’m gonna hit the hay.” Tony gave Sam an appreciative nod and then Sam left the kitchen.

“You sure you’re okay?” Pepper asked gently. Peter nodded. It was nice to have Pepper concerned for him. He was only used to May’s form of concern, always hovering and asking him how he was and constantly checking in on him. He loved May, but Pepper’s concern for him was less helicopter-parent. It was a nice change of pace. She patted his cheek and gave him a small smile. Tony squeezed his fiancée’s hand as she headed out of the kitchen, not even looking at Bucky and Steve as she passed. Tony glanced at them, not sure why they were even still there.

“Mr. Barnes?” Peter’s voice broke the silence and Bucky looked at the kid, guilt all over his face. “I’m not mad at you, I was just startled.” 

“Sorry for scaring you,” Bucky said. “I didn’t mean to and I swear it won’t happen again.”

“Better not,” Tony said, it coming out as more of a growl. Bucky took a step backwards, almost afraid that Tony would attack him. Steve gave Tony a look and he sighed. “Just give the kid some space, okay?” Steve nodded and guided Bucky out of the kitchen. Tony turned towards Peter, who smiled weakly at him.

“I’m okay Mr. Stark,” Peter offered weakly. “Really.” Tony clenched his fists a little, wondering if he was going to have his own panic attack in that moment. The moment passed and he clapped Peter on the shoulder. 

“Just get some sleep kid,” Tony said. Peter nodded and got off the stool. Tony wrapped his arm around Peter’s shoulder and walked him down the hallway. They reached his door and Tony noticed the desk light on and the books. “I hope you’re going to actually go to sleep and not just keep doing homework.”

“That’s rich coming from the king of not sleeping,” Peter said, cheekily. Tony rolled his eyes, glad the kid wasn’t still overwhelmed. Tony ruffled his hair, chuckling at how flustered it made Peter.

“Well I’m going to sleep,” Tony said. “And you should too.” Peter nodded. “Night Peter.”

“Night Mr. Stark,” Peter went into the room and Tony closed the door, nodding when he saw Peter crawl into the bed. He headed back to his own room, relief flooding through him.

The next morning, they were greeted by the sight of Bucky Barnes, the former Winter Soldier, baking cookies. Because apparently that was what Bucky did to apologize for causing a fifteen-year-old to have a panic attack. As mad as Tony wanted to be, he couldn’t, when he saw how excited Peter got about the cookies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scream at me over comments? Or on my Tumblr? http://doctornineandthreequarters.tumblr.com/


	4. Thunder Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything was going fine. Until the thunder.
> 
> None of the Avengers seemed to bat an eye at the storm. It was a little sad to say, but they had all been through much worse. What did startle them was the crashing sound coming from the kitchen. The lightning flashed illuminating the dark room and Tony could see Peter in the kitchen, both his hands over his ears. Tony’s eyes widened and he quickly moved off the couch. Another boom of thunder sounded and Peter’s body shook

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter. My take on a panic attack from sensory overload.

**4.**

Everyone sat in the Common Room, a movie playing on the big screen. Rain pattered against the glass window outside. Clint and Sam were seated on the ground, Clint having basically made himself a fort of pillows to lie on, while Sam had somehow only been left with one pillow for his back. Nat was sitting in a chair behind Clint, her legs tucked on the chair underneath a blanket, a small bowl of popcorn in her lap, that Clint would occasionally hold his hand out for. Wanda and Vision were cuddled up on the couch, Wanda almost basically on Vision’s lap (not that he seemed to mind). Steve was in the chair opposite from where Nat was, Bucky sitting on the floor next to the chair, keeping his distance from Peter. Sure, the kid had forgiven him for the panic attack, but Tony didn’t and Bucky didn’t need any more reason than to stay away from him.

Tony was sitting on the side of the couch closest to Nat. Peter was next to him, his head slowly lolling back. It was late, but the kid had convinced everyone to start another movie. Now it was clear he could barely keep his eyes open. Tony just wrapped an arm around the kid and, almost instinctively, Peter’s head dropped against Tony’s side, the teen seemingly giving in to sleep. Tony was pretty sure the movie was almost over, he had seen it before, so he’d convince the kid to go to sleep then.

Tony had wanted to spend the night working in the lab, after Pepper had had to cancel their date to deal with Stark Industries bs (she was the CEO and someone had to make sure his company didn’t fail). He was a little annoyed but understood. He had made her CEO after all and god was she good at it (also, powerful jobs suited her and Tony loved a powerful woman). He would’ve bothered Rhodey, but Rhodey was in DC dealing with something (Tony didn’t know what, he kind of tuned Rhodey out when his political discussions didn’t involve the Avengers or super-powered individuals). That left Tony to tinker in the lab. Until the kid suggested a movie night. Wanda obviously agreed with him, Vision following suit. Clint and Sam had started arguing about what to watch, only agreeing to yield when Peter suggested watching multiple movies. Everyone else agreed, except Bucky, who had been keeping his distance. Steve had finally convinced him to join, but Tony noticed him staying as far away from him and Peter as possible. _Good_ , he had thought. _Kid doesn’t need another panic attack_.

Peter sat up a little, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. Without saying anything, he climbed over the couch and headed towards the kitchen. Tony watched him, wondering what he was doing. When he realized the kid was getting a glass of water, he looked back at the screen. 

Everything was going fine. Until the thunder.

None of the Avengers seemed to bat an eye at the storm. It was a little sad to say, but they had all been through much worse. What did startle them was the crashing sound coming from the kitchen. The lightning flashed illuminating the dark room and Tony could see Peter in the kitchen, both his hands over his ears. Tony’s eyes widened and he quickly moved off the couch. Another boom of thunder sounded and Peter’s body shook.

“Lights FRIDAY,” Tony ordered, making his way over to the distressed teen. 

“Too bright,” Peter said, ducking his head. Everyone else in the room was suddenly aware that something was wrong. Peter was very clearly shaking, his hands clamped over his ears. Lightning flashed again and Peter made a pained sound. Sam crossed the room quickly. 

“Another one?” Sam asked, looking at Peter. Tony wasn’t sure. Peter was clearly distressed, but he wasn’t breathing heavily. His body was shaking and Tony knew that was also a sign of panic.

“Too bright,” Peter whined. “Too loud.” Thunder boomed again and Peter slid down to the ground, his knees pulled up to his chest. He buried his head in his knees, trying to block out the sound. Wanda nearly ran across the room, planting herself on the floor next to Peter. Nat was next, squatting down in front of Peter.

"маленький паук,” Nat said and Peter shook his head. Peter felt like his head was exploding. Everything was too loud and bright. Every little sound hurt him. He tried to keep his breath even, but every noise was overwhelming and hurt. Lightning illuminated the room and Peter whimpered. Wanda reached over and stroked Peter’s head, not sure what to do. Tony watched helplessly, unsure what was happening.

“Lights at 10 percent FRIDAY,” Tony said. The lights dimmed. Peter looked up. Everything still felt bright and painful, but not as much as before. The rest of the Avengers seemed to be circled around him, so he couldn’t see the window. “Kid, what’s wrong?”

“Senses,” Peter said. “Everything’s too much. Dialed to 11.” Thunder boomed again and Peter yelped. His breathing started to become erratic. The sound was too much. Sam looked at Tony, knowing Peter was about to slip back into panic attack. 

“Do something Wilson,” Tony said. “I might have something that can help, but I need a minute.” Sam nodded. Tony quickly made his way towards the elevator, to head to his lab. Sam knelt down in front of Peter.

“Peter,” Sam said. “We’re gonna try another new technique, alright?” Peter shook his head. “Damn kid, don’t be so stubborn, just trust me.” Peter attempted to nod, but he was shaking badly. “It’s called grounding, okay? I want you to tell my five things you can see, okay?” Peter took a shaky breath.

“You,” Peter said. “Ms. Romanoff.” Nat gave him a small smile. “Wanda.” Wanda was still seated next to him. She wasn’t brushing his hair anymore, hoping Sam could help. “Mr. Barnes and Captain Rogers.” Normally both Bucky and Steve would’ve told him to not be so formal. He looked around, trying to spot Tony. “W-where’s Mr. Stark?” 

“He’ll be back kid,” Sam said. “Jut focus on me, okay? Four things you can touch.” Thunder boomed again and Peter whimpered. “Four things, kid.” 

“T-t-the cabinet,” Peter said, feeling the cold marble against his back. “Wanda’s sleeve.” He reached his arm out, making sure it was her sleeve and not her arm. Wanda smiled a watery smile at him, still worried about him.

“Two more kid, come on,” Sam said, pushing him to keep going. His breathing was becoming less erratic, but Peter was still shaking.

“T-the floor,” Peter said, his other hand, gently brushing the cold tile. “T-the handle to the cabinet.”

“This one is going to difficult okay,” Sam said. “But three things you can hear.” Peter nodded slowly. His ears still felt like they were burning.

“R-rain,” Peter said, hearing each drop, hit the windows. “Your voice. M-Mr. Barnes’ arm.” Bucky looked down at his arm, realizing he was slowly bending it. Clearly, the kid had good ears.

“Two things you can smell,” Sam said.

“P-popcorn,” Peter said. His breathing seeming to even out. He was still shaking and clearly upset. “S-someone’s cologne.”

“Probably Sam’s,” Nat said, with a small smirk. Sam rolled his eyes, a wry smile on his face.

“Last one kid,” Sam said. “One thing you can taste.” Peter, even if his startled state, gave Sam a confused look. “Yeah it’s weird, just go with it.”

“O-okay,” Peter said. “The s-soda I drank earlier.” Sam nodded. Suddenly, Tony was back in the room. He had what looked like a pair of headphones in his hand. Sam moved out of the way as Tony knelt in front of Peter. He slipped them over Peter’s ears and suddenly, Peter couldn’t hear anything. Everything was quiet. He could still see everyone, but there was no sound. He felt his heart rate start to slow down. The pounding in his head started to diminish. Eventually, his body stopped shaking. Tony relaxed a little, seeing Peter begin to come down from the panic attack. Everyone stared at Tony, wondering what he did.

“Soundproof headphones,” Tony said. “I think the kid was experiencing a sensory overload from the storm.” There was a collective nod. Peter slowly removed one ear piece. “Feeling a little better, Pete?” Peter nodded.

“C-can I go now?” He asked. He was embarrassed by yet another panic attack. He was never going to be an Avenger if every little thing freaked him out. He slowly stood up and Tony offered him a hand to help. Peter kept his arms tightly at his sides, using the cabinet as support. Tony frowned at this, realizing Peter wouldn’t accept his help. Tony stood up straight, staring down at the teen. “I think I just need to sleep.”

“Keep the headphones,” Tony said. Peter nodded, recovering his ear. He slowly made his way around everyone and disappeared towards his room. 

“That was odd,” Clint said. 

“He’s probably embarrassed,” Sam said. “We all saw him in a pretty vulnerable state.” Tony sighed. He was probably now more worried about Peter than before. Panic attacks weren’t a sign of weakness; he’d had enough of them to know. But clearly, something about the whole team seeing Peter have a panic attack upset the kid.

“We’ll figure it all out tomorrow,” Tony said. “I think that’s enough excitement for one night.” Everyone nodded and dispersed to their individual rooms. Tony laid in bed the whole night, unable to sleep, his mind filled with thoughts of worry for the youngest member of their team.

The rest of the weekend, Peter was disturbingly quiet. He said very little at meals. He was withdrawn during trainings and didn’t want to spend additional time with anyone else. By the time the weekend came to an end, Peter got into the car Happy was driving without a word, a sad look on his face. Tony’s heart hurt watching the kid be so upset. 

And the worst part was, he didn’t know how to make it better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scream with me on my tumblr: http://doctornineandthreequarters.tumblr.com/


	5. Too Many People Talking At Once

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter’s ears were starting to burn from the noise. He grimaced, not that anyone noticed. He gripped his hands into fists under the table, trying to stop his body from shaking. He could not be having a panic attack, not right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

**5.**

Peter sat in Decathlon practice, feeling awful. The whole day had felt bad. Hell, the whole week had felt bad. He just had been feeling awful since his panic attack at the Compound the previous weekend. Tony had been texting him nonstop and Peter had barely responded. Couldn’t he understand the concept of space? Even May had noticed his crappy mood. She had tried to cheer him up with Thai food and Star Wars, but none of it seemed to work.

Peter just felt awful.

It didn’t help that everything felt so loud to him. He had left the soundproof headphones at the Compound. He was ashamed that he even needed them, ashamed that his sensory overload had led to a panic attack. Hell, he was ashamed he was even having these panic attacks. He was Spider-Man, he needed to know how to keep his cool.

“Mr. Parker,” Mr. Harrington brought Peter out of his daze of thoughts. Peter smiled weakly and listened as the teacher talked about their next meet. Supposedly, it was a big deal, not that Peter was really listening, just enough to know what was going on. MJ shot Peter a look and he sat up a little straighter. She was the captain after all, he knew better than to not listen to her.

“This meet is important,” MJ said. “If we lose, we have no chance at Nationals. We’ll need to be extremely focused to beat Stuyvesant.”

“I heard they study for four hours a day,” Cindy said. “And that some of them even have a study guide playing for them while they sleep.”

“They’re crazy,” Abe said.

“Crazy smart,” Sally countered.

“We can totally beat them,” Ned pointed out and MJ nodded. Everyone started talking, loudly about their plan to beat Stuyvesant. Peter frowned, the noise starting to overwhelm him. Did they all have to talk at once? And so loudly?

“The five competing will be the same as the last meet,” MJ said. “So Flash you’re still an alternate.”

“You’re gonna let Parker compete over me?” Flash said indignantly. “He missed two practices last week!”

“He’s the best on the team,” Cindy said.

“And he always gets the physics questions right,” Abe countered. Peter’s ears were starting to burn from the noise. He grimaced, not that anyone noticed. He gripped his hands into fists under the table, trying to stop his body from shaking. He could not be having a panic attack, not right now. Everyone’s voices continued to raise, arguing about who should compete. Peter stood up suddenly. Everyone stared at him. His face was pale and his eyes were wide. It was clear to everyone that something was wrong. Without a word, he bolted out of the room. He heard someone, maybe Ned or MJ, call after him. But he just started running. He ran until he was out of the school and just keep going, his heart pounding in his chest.

* * *

 

Tony was working in his lab, well trying to work. Pepper was standing over him, stacks of papers in her hands, trying to get Tony to sign them. 

“Stop ignoring me,” Pepper said, putting her free hand on her hip. “You have to sign these.”

“Busy honey,” Tony said, tinkering with the Iron Spider suit. Pepper rolled her eyes. Tony could be so childish sometimes.

“Sign these or you’re sleeping on the couch tonight.” Tony sighed and put the tools down. Pepper smiled sweetly at him and in response, he stuck his tongue out at her. He signed the papers and then she kissed him on the cheek.

“You’re impossible sometimes,” She said.

“And you’re marrying me anyways,” Tony pointed out. Pepper was about to respond when FRIDAY interrupted.

“Boss,” FRIDAY’s voice intoned. “You asked me to alert you if Mr. Parker’s heart rate exceeds normal conditions outside of the suit.” Pepper gave him a look and Tony shrugged.

“And?” He said, waiting for FRIDAY to explain.

“Peter’s heart rate has been elevated for the past five minutes,” Tony stood up. Pepper noticed a very protective look pass over his features. 

“Location FRI?” Tony said, moving towards one of the screens in the lab. He pulled up a map of Queens, trying to figure out where Peter might’ve been headed.

“He’s on the move,” FRIDAY said. “But his pattern of movement is erratic and becoming very difficult to track.” Tony sighed loudly and turned towards Pepper.

“I gotta go, figure this out,” Pepper nodded, that encouraging smile of hers on her face.

“I know,” She kissed him on the cheek and left the lab. Tony moved towards the suit with a sigh.

“Do your best to track him FRI,” Tony said. All he could think was that Peter was running through Queens somewhere, slowly slipping into a panic attack, and he was alone.

There was only one thing Tony could do.

* * *

 

Peter sat on the roof of the building. Well, he wasn’t sitting, more like collapsed on his knees gasping for air. He wasn’t really sure how, but he had managed to get up to the roof even in his state of immense panic. He could still hear every voice from practice, their yells magnified in his head. 

“S-stop,” He moaned. He held his head as their voices only got louder. His lungs screamed for air that he couldn’t seem to get. His chest burned with pain from the lack of oxygen. His vision was blurry, but he didn’t know if it was from the lack of oxygen or from his tears. 

He should’ve called for help. Should’ve called Ned or May. He should’ve called Tony or anyone on the team. But he couldn’t. So there he was, alone, unable to calm himself down.

“B-breathe,” He sputtered out loud. “G-ground yourself.” He thought back to Tony trying to get him to match his breathing and tried to suck in a breath. His lungs burned but he forced himself to do it anyways. He thought of Wanda crushing him into a hug, a layer of protection against his panic. What he would’ve given to have someone there to help him. 

 _Five things you see_. It was almost like he could hear Sam’s voice.

“S-subway,” Peter gasped out, searching the skyline. “Apartment buildings, a weird ad for shampoo, streetlights, and.” He paused, his eyes searching for something. A bird flew over him. “A s-stupid pigeon.” He rubbed tears away, gasping for air as he did.

 _Four things you can touch_.

“M-my sleeves,” He said, his sleeves of his sweatshirt balled up around his fast. “The roof.” He reached around and found a small rock. “A rock.” He threw it pathetically away. “My sh-shoes.” His chest was still hurting but not as bad before.

_Three things you can hear._

“S-sirens,” He said. It was New York after all. Sirens were extraordinarily common. They were a lullaby to most natives. “Subway cars.” He stopped to listen to find a final sound. He heard a familiar engine roar. He looked up to see the Iron Man suit just as it landed on the roof.

“M-Mr. Stark,” Peter said, trying to get out. Tony was out of the suit in a second, nearly catching Peter as he crashed into him. 

“Are you okay kid?” Tony asked and Peter shook his head. “Deep breaths okay?” Peter nodded, focusing on his breathing. Tony breathed with him until he was sure Peter’s breathing was even. “What happened Pete?”

“Decathlon practice,” Peter said, a sad tone in his voice. “Everyone was talking at once and it got overwhelming.” Tony nodded. “I should’ve…I should’ve called someone for help.” Tony sighed and simply pulled Peter into a hug. Peter buried his face in Tony’s shirt, not caring that he was crying. Tony just hugged him tightly, willing the kid’s pain to go away. Peter sniffled and finally pulled away.

“I’ve got Happy in a car on the street,” Tony said. “I can take you home or the tower or anywhere really. You name it.” Peter wiped his eyes. May was working a late shift and wasn’t going to be home until the next morning.

“The Tower’s fine,” Peter said. Tony nodded and pressed a button on his watch. The Iron Man suit flew away in a blast. Tony wrapped his arm around the kid’s shoulder. Peter leaned into Tony for support as they made their way down to the car. 

* * *

 

Peter was exhausted as they got back to the tower. The sun was only just setting but all Peter wanted to do was sleep. He had dozed off in the car, using Tony’s shoulder as a pillow. Tony didn’t say anything about it, just kept his arm wrapped protective around the kid. Once Happy pulled into a spot in the garage. Tony got out of the car. Peter shuffled out after him, sticking close to his side. They rode the elevator in silence, Tony keeping a watchful eye on Peter and Peter picking at a loose string on his sweatshirt.

“Any chance you’re hungry?” Tony asked. Peter shrugged, but his stomach growled, giving him a way. Tony smirked and Peter had a slightly embarrassed look on his face. “I’ll order some pizza.” They reached the penthouse and stepped out. When they approached the Common Room, they saw it wasn’t empty. 

The whole team was there. Everyone, including Pepper. Everyone was seated on the couch or the floor, idly chatting. When they heard the elevator shut, the conversation stopped. Peter’s ears turned red with embarrassment. Did they know what happened?

“I’ll order a lot of pizza,” Tony said, patting Peter on the shoulder. “You gonna be okay for a second?” Peter nodded and Tony stepped to the side to make a phone call. He approached the group, his sweatshirt balled around his hands. Pepper approached him first.

“Hi sweetie,” Pepper said, a kind smiling crossing her face. “I hope you don’t mine everyone’s here. We all just wanted to make sure you were okay.” Peter looked around the room at the kind faces. Just a week ago, he had been embarrassed that they had seen him be so vulnerable. Yet they had all come to the Tower to make sure that he was okay. His hands released his sweatshirt and fell to his sides.

“Thank you Ms. Potts,” Peter said. She smiled and gently squeezed his shoulder before walking over to where Tony was. She stood in front of him as he talked on the phone, taking his free hand and waiting for him to be done. He walked over to the rest of the Avengers. Wanda nearly ran him over with a hug. As soon as he got his bearings, he hugged her back. She pulled away and fixed a loose piece of hair.

“Can’t go around scaring us like that маленький паук,” Nat said, with a small smile on her face. Peter shrugged apologetically. Peter turned to Sam who looked him over with the watchful eye of a mental health care professional. 

“I used the grounding technique,” Peter said. “Well I started to.” Sam smiled a little and gave Peter a light punch on the arm.

“We’ll work on it,” Sam said. “You’re my number one client.”

“He doesn’t pay you,” Bucky pointed out and Sam rolled his eyes.

“At least he listens to me,” Sam said. “Unlike you two relics.” Sam waved a lazy hand at Bucky and Steve. “Over here with your clear PTSD from the war. It’s been 70 years, y’all should deal with it.” Steve gave Sam a look and Bucky rolled his eyes.

“You should listen to him Mr. Barnes,” Peter said. “Don’t want to spend the rest of your life scaring innocent teenagers.” Sam laughed loudly. 

“You’re far from an innocent teenager, spider-punk,” Bucky said, with a smirk. Peter shrugged again as Tony and Pepper approached.

“Pizza should be here soon,” Tony said. “Had to order enough to feed two super soldiers and one spiderling with enhanced metabolism. And Barton, I didn’t get any with pineapple on it.” Clint threw his hands up in the air in frustration, eliciting a chuckle from the group. Tony put a hand on Peter’s shoulder. “You good, kid?” Peter looked around at the group in front of him. All of them had been there for him, even when he was ashamed about his panic attacks. And it was clear that they would keep being there for him.

“Yeah,” Peter said with a smile. “I’m good.” 

“Let’s watch a movie then!” 

“I’m picking!”

“The fuck you are, Barton!”

“Language Sam, there’s a child present!”

“I’m fifteen Mr. Rogers!” The group scurried towards the couch, except for Tony and Pepper. Tony watched everyone pile into their normal place, Peter with a grin on his face. Tony couldn’t help but smile, something Pepper noticed. She kissed him on the cheek and pulled him towards the group, settling down on the couch, effectively squishing Tony between herself and Peter. Peter looked around at the group and smiled.

 Yeah, he was going to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What an ending! Scream with me on my tumblr? http://doctornineandthreequarters.tumblr.com/


	6. The One Time He Didn't

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter laughed and couldn’t wipe the grin off his face. He wasn’t stressed or upset. His breathing was regular and his chest didn’t feel tight. He was happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning...this chapter is so soft.

**+1**

Peter sat at the table in the Compound, angrily staring at his computer. He had a paper to do and it just wasn’t coming to him and how to get started. He huffed angrily and sat back in his seat.

“You okay spider-punk?” He looked up. Bucky had been sitting across the table from him. Sometimes, Bucky was so quiet that Peter would forget he was in the room. Sometimes, just bumping into Bucky would still startle Peter. He could see that bothered Bucky, but there wasn’t much he could do about it. Peter sighed.

“I have a history paper due Monday and I don’t know how to get started.” Peter said.

“What’s it on?” Bucky asked, closing his book.

“World War II.” Bucky snorted and got up, crossing to Peter’s side of the table. Peter felt his chest tighten a little as the super soldier approached.

“You want help with that?” Bucky asked. “Since, you know, I was there?” The tension in his chest seemed to evaporate suddenly.

“Oh,” Peter said, feeling a little embarrassed. “Yeah. That’d be great Mr. Barnes.” Bucky pulled up a chair next to Peter.

“You can call me Bucky, spider-punk,” Bucky said and Peter shrugged. He started typing, asking Bucky a few questions about the war every few sentences or so. Bucky watched the kids’ hands fly across the keyboard, surprised that anybody could type so fast (then again, he could barely use a computer). Neither seemed to notice the passage of time, until Steve and Sam entered the room.

“Hey Buck,” Steve called and Bucky looked up and nodded to him. “What are you two working on?” Peter looked up from his computer.

“Mr. Barnes is helping me with my history paper,” Peter said. “I’m actually almost done, thanks to his help.” Bucky smiled a little. He was glad he had helped the kid and not sent him into a panic.

“Well good,” Sam said. “Because you owe twenty minutes of mediation.”

“Mr. Wilson,” Peter whined.

“Ten from yesterday and ten for today,” Sam said. “Don’t make me sick Stark on you.” Peter pouted.

“Why am I being sicked?” Tony asked, entering the room. Sam gave Peter a knowing look, who’s eyes widened comically.

“No reason!” Peter shouted, saving his assignment and closing his laptop. “Just gotta go meditate. See you guys later.” He then dashed off to his room. Sam chuckled and Tony just shook his head. Tony went to the kitchen, busying himself with something to do. He’d been in the lab, but had gotten bored. He wouldn’t say it out loud, but he was at a point where working in the lab without Peter’s constant chatter was becoming dull. But if he admitted that out loud, someone who accuse him of being soft or acting like Peter’s dad and he was not having that conversation again (because Clint wouldn’t leave him alone about it). 

The man in question, had just entered the room with Nat and Wanda, all clearly having finished training. Everyone seemed to congregate to the couches. Rhodey and Vision had come into the room as well. They seemed to be discussing what to do for the rest of the evening. Tony just shook his head, as he went about making something for dinner. After a while, the team settled on video games (Mario Kart, to be exact). Tony wasn’t too interested in joining them, but he didn’t have to worry about being alone. Precisely two minutes after the game started, Peter appeared in the kitchen, sliding to a stop on the tiled floor. 

“Hey kid,” Tony said, looking up from the pasta he was stirring. “Where’d you run off to?”

“Mr. Wilson said I had to meditate,” Peter said. “He told me twenty minutes.” 

“Definitely wasn’t twenty minutes, kiddo,” Tony said, pointing the spoon at Peter. Peter shrugged, a wry smile on his face.

“I don’t think Mr. Wilson will notice.” 

“I noticed!” Peter pouted and his shoulders slumped. “You beat me in this game though, I’ll drop it.” Peter perked up a little. He turned to go, but Tony stopped him.

“Pete,” Tony said. “Just as days go, how does today feel?” It was something Tony had been trying since Peter’s last panic attack. He’d read online that it was a good way to gauge feelings of stress, panic, or anxiety.

“Like an 8?” Peter offered. Tony couldn’t help but smile a little bit. 

“Glad to hear it,” Tony said. “Now go kick Wilson’s ass.” Peter laughed and ran over to the couch, squishing himself between Clint and Wanda. He was given a controller. Tony watched the kid. He had a huge smile on his face and was laughing. Everyone seemed to be cheering him on (which totally annoyed Sam). And when he won, everyone except Sam cheered. 

Peter laughed and couldn’t wipe the grin off his face. He wasn’t stressed or upset. His breathing was regular and his chest didn’t feel tight. He was happy. And maybe every day wouldn’t feel like that. There were going to be days that were worse than others. There were going to be days when he did have a panic attack. But there were also going to be days were he could sit with people who cared about him and laugh like nothing was wrong in the world. And to Peter, that was all that really mattered. 

Panic attacks or not, he had people that would be there for him through it all. And that gave him comfort.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scream with me on my tumblr? http://doctornineandthreequarters.tumblr.com/

**Author's Note:**

> Yell at me on my tumblr: http://doctornineandthreequarters.tumblr.com/


End file.
